Girl Seeks Bliss Excerpt - Chapter 1 Available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble.
		Life According to Buddha You could say that Buddha was a kind of spiritual Einstein-a think-out-of-the-box intellectual who decided to focus his efforts on understanding and overcoming the fundamental causes of human unhappiness. Some time around 450 B.C. his study led to breakthroughs about the nature of existence. Those breakthroughs form the basis of Buddhism, and they still stand up to scrutiny some 2,500 years later. Contrary to what the robes, temples, and rituals might lead you to believe, Buddhism doesn't have much in common with most other major religions. For one, there is no all-knowing, all-powerful deity to worship, please, or piss off. Buddha never claimed to be a god or to believe in any gods. As far as rewards and punishments for everyday actions go, he taught that if a person acts skillfully-with intelligence and compassion-good things are likely to come her way. If a person acts unskillfully-with ignorance and carelessness-then it's likely that her life will often be difficult and unpleasant. He considered this to be a natural, universal law. Buddhism in its most basic form-stripped of the different cultural traditions that have risen around it over the centuries-is best described as a type of secular logic that anyone is free to agree or disagree with. That's why so many practical, realistic people are attracted to it. Buddha taught that the only way to know anything for sure was to experience it yourself. So he advised his students to put his ideas to the test before deciding if they were true. As for far-out questions such as where all life comes from or what happens when we die, his standpoint was that while they were fine subjects to ruminate on, getting all riled up over the unknowable is no way to free ourselves from suffering and enjoy life from moment to moment. For people who are looking for a straightforward, no-bullshit approach to happiness, Buddhism is one big breath of fresh air. *********************************************** Monks, I will teach you everything. Listen to it. What, monks, is "everything"? Eye and material form, ear and sound, nose and odor, tongue and taste, body and tangible objects, mind and mental objects. These are called "everything." A person might say, "I will reject this 'everything' and proclaim another 'everything.'" He may certainly have a theory of his own. But when questioned, he would not be able to answer and would, moreover, be subject to vexation. Why? Because it would not be within the range of experience. *********************************************** BUDDHIST LOGIC 101 At the very core of every school of Buddhism around the world are 'the four noble truths.' Buddha came to these or conclusions about how the world works after years of education, personal experience, and meditation. Noble Truth #1 The first noble truth is that life is isn't easy for anyone. Regardless of how gorgeous, rich, talented, brilliant, funny, and/or popular a person may be, they will often be unhappy, unsatisfied, confused, angry, lonely, uncomfortable, nervous, and/or every other negative emotion you can think of. Supermodels, Oscar-winning actresses, ridiculously rich heiresses--they will all curl up in their beds, cry their hearts out, and feel like crap countless times over the course of their lives. This is because there is no such thing as lasting satisfaction or never-ending happiness for anyone. Nothing is permanent, not the the good or the bad. That might sound like a downer, but it doesn't have to be. Reminding ourselves that everyone struggles with the same disappointments, fears and anxieties has a way of making our own problems feel a little less dramatic and a lot easier to bear. That's why picking up the phone and telling a friend all about some disaster in your life is such a relief. You get it all off of your chest and she reminds you that something like that once happened to her. She gets it. She knows what you're going through. She feels your pain. That simple compassion is usually enough to calm you down. Understanding that absolutely everyone suffers at one point or another sucks the life right out of envy and jealousy. We might think we'd be happier if we were all world-class athletes with Ph.D.'s and a billion dollars in the bank, but who knows what the downsides of that life would be? Maybe they would be harder to take than your current reality (I know it's hard to imagine, but consider the behind-the-scenes lives of Marilyn Monroe or Princess Diana). Most importantly, realizing that negative emotions and events are an inherent part of life is the first step to overcoming them. If we even begin to accept the first noble truth--suffering is a natural part of existence--then suffering itself loses some of its power over us. ******************************************** Desperately Seeking Siddhartha If you were looking for Buddha in a crowded room, you'd do best to keep your eye out for a six-foot Indian guy with blue eyes and a suspiciously serene smile. Those are the few physical characteristics of the sage that are consistently backed by various sources. Like any other larger-than-life figure who existed prior to photography, Buddha's image has been interpreted and embellished by artists from different cultures who often give him traits they considered superior to the average guy (extra long earlobes, hair that curled only in one direction, an enormous penis, webbed fingers and toes, that massive spare tire and those jolly cheeks...). Historians agree that the Buddha was born Siddhartha Guatama around 543 B.C. in what is now the western part of Nepal. His parents belonged to the Ksatriya caste, the second highest in the Indian class system and the one responsible for running the military and government. Siddhartha's father was the king of his clan (called the Sakyas), making his mother a queen and Siddhartha a bona fide prince. He was married around the age of seventeen to one of his equally well-off cousins (getting hitched as a teen and to a distant family member were both common practices at the time). He probably had many children with his wife and concubines, one of which was a son named Rahula who later became a devoted follower. If the Buddha were alive today he'd probably have a triple Ph.D. in philosophy, religion and psychology and a tenured position at Harvard, though he wouldn't have focused on those subjects until he was around thirty years old. As the story goes, it was at that point in his life when he decided to start investigating the causes of human suffering. He was an eager and tireless student. Before devising his own route to happiness, he explored several established intellectual and spiritual paths including a form of asceticism that involved near-starvation and total exposure to the elements. After seven years of studying with philosophers and religious leaders, he finally had the breakthrough that allowed him to understand life on a deeper level. That breakthrough, which occurred after fasting and meditating for several days, was his realization of Nirvana. From then on he was known as the Buddha, or 'awakened one.' ********************************************** Noble Truth #2 The second noble truth is that suffering is caused by unnecessary craving. To some extent, that includes the small stuff-vanilla chai lattés, Prada shoes, a smaller laptop, a pair of jeans that make your ass look perfect. We think, 'if only I had that right now, I'd be happy.' Which we are, for a few minutes here and there. But superficial acquisitions don't provide deep satisfaction, or prevent us from feeling sad, lonely, lost, or frustrated. We soon forget about them and start jonesing for something else. While craving the little stuff can drain our bank accounts and waste a lot of our time and energy, it usually only leads to a mild amount of suffering. Most of us don't get too bent out of shape if we can't get our hands on a particular pair of shoes. It's the serious, deep-seated cravings that really make us inconsolable--wishing that a relationship wasn't ending, that we could take back something regrettable that we did or said in the past, or wishing that we had a different job, a different body, a different life. These kinds of cravings can make us seriously depressed. Wanting things, people, or emotions to stay as they are is another kind of wishful thinking that gets us into major trouble as is the desire to completely control another person or a situation. The second noble truth is crucial to Buddhism because we have to know what makes us unhappy in order to defeat it. Noble Truth #3 Now, finally, comes the ray of sunshine: The third noble truth states simply that there is a way to reduce, and even end, suffering. Instead of waiting for those rare, wonderful flashes of calm satisfaction to occur at random, we can train ourselves to feel more content on a regular basis. For those of us whose goal is not to become a fully devoted Buddhist monk who spends the great majority of her time meditating, it's unlikely that we'll ever feel completely impervious to all of the annoyances and difficulties of daily life. But just beginning to embrace Buddhist philosophy can help us keep each glitch in perspective, bounce back more quickly, and handle the whole messy struggle with a lot more patience and grace. Noble Truth #4 So, exactly how long and complicated is the Buddha's path to happiness? Not long or complicated-but definitely not easy. The fourth noble truth consists of eight basic guidelines for living the good life, otherwise known as the 'eight-fold path.' As with every other aspect of his teaching, Buddha insisted that any interested person test his theories for themselves and never take for granted that they're right or true. So consider the following eight bits of advice to be exactly that: advice, not rules. These ideas are ancient, but as wise and practical as ever. Keep in mind that Buddha conveyed all of the nuances of his philosophy orally between the years of 490 B.C. and 450 B.C. It wasn't until centuries later that his teachings--which had been memorized and passed on from one generation of monks to the next--were written down in Sanskrit and Pali, an ancient Indo-Aryan dialect, and eventually translated into English. As a result, there is a lot of human interpretation involved here-including my own. All that matters is what rings true to you.